Even my French is rusting?

I just wrote a remix of one of my old proses in French in French. I didn't have any trouble finding the words, but the ideas didn't flow as well as before. (I tend to have the reversed problem when writing in English: have ideas but spend like 10 minutes trying to get a dictionnaire that tells me how to say said idea in English.)

Oh, also, when I opened the archive of the original prose in dreamwidth it was blank. Did I fail to archive it? I didn't need it to do the remix, but I would like to re-read the original. I remember one of the French teachers, the one who looked like a sylph made of wine-like poems and soft melancholic winds, pale skin always warped in darker fabrics, commented on it and said that it was feminist. I didn't intent it to sound feminist though. It was more like my memento mori. It was pulled from such depth of my subconsciousness that I couldn't explain what I just wrote. All I knew was that it felt macabre. A friend told me that the black box as probably an allusion to the box used to keep people's last will before dying from a plane crash. He sounded right.

This remix is no less macabre.

I did another remix of the same prose before, but I can't find it anywhere. I can find the rather crappy extension though. I think the remix prose was on LJ, but I no longer have access to it.

I guess that makes it a double memento mori.

Edit: Turned out it was a bracket (voc?) trouble on the prose archive. Comparing them.

Conclusion

Ok, I need to stop chewing on old depressive poems and proses that only melancholic French teachers like and start writing things that I like. That means a lot of crossdressers, robots, dinosaurs, baby dinosaurs, birds, enhanced cyborg sharks, sniper guns, flintlock guns, horses that run on water and clouds, gay guys kissing straight girls, lesbian warriors, zettai ryouki, delicious food, young men and women playing board games together in a bromantic way, best buddies, yin/yang combo battle couples, etc.